Crackdown on people who say "I'm not like other people"
Officers confirm they are, in fact, exactly like other people. Fines issued on the spot.
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G'day, Citizen.
The Bureau of Vibe Compliance keeps Australia's vibes safe, fair and not cringe. We've reviewed your file. We have concerns.
Service alert: Due to record demand, the Vibe Appeal Tribunal is only hearing appeals from people who are actually fun. Current wait time: indefinite.
Complete your Vibe Assessment
Mandatory for all residents. Yes, even you. Especially you.
Vibe Offences register
Full list of offences and penalties, including the one you did at Christmas.
Pay a Vibe Fine
Settle your outstanding infringements before they're referred to your group chat.
Contact a Vibe Officer
Our officers are available 24/7, except when they're busy, which is always.
Latest from the Bureau
"Just one more game" officially reclassified as a lie
Following a 14-month investigation, the phrase has been added to the national register of things nobody believes.
Man who reheats fish in office microwave placed on watchlist
He has been identified only as "Steve from accounts". Steve, we know it's you.
Record number of vibe checks failed in the Gold Coast region
Analysts blame a combination of boat shoes, energy drinks and people who say "no worries" aggressively.
Reminder: sending "k" is a Category 2 offence
"Kk" is still under legal review.
National vibe statistics
Australians with a passing vibe 61%
People who clap when the plane lands 2.1 million
Unanswered "u up?" texts this year 48,900,112
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